Learning now that I’m developing feelings for you that maybe you feel any girl would at this point in time. No lie, I love spending time with you. I love it when you’re here. I love it when you’re right next to me. However let me remind you that I’m a different breed of woman that you’re probably not used to.

Let me start by telling you all the qualities I do like about you and although we should be having this conversation in person, I’d rather jot it down and tell you the real and what’s really been racking up in my brain, no interruptions. To start off I I wanna bring it back to the day we first started to the moment we met. Neither of us would’ve been able to call how quickly we clicked. I remember coming home with butterflies in my stomach, “Something about you just makes me happy…” even remembering every word you said and you said that within1 hour I stepped in your car. Funny thing is I remember everything you say, even our first time….
That was back in September last year.

I love that you work hard. I love that you’re there for your friends and for your family when you need to be. I love that you’re about something and not out here acting a damn fool being reckless. I love that you don’t take things too seriously and can find laughter in everything you do even when shit gets awkward between us. You’re silly and I love that because that’s one thing I can learn from you. In a sense I feel like you came in a time where my world was very dark and confused and I was just plain stuck and unhappy. Maybe it’s luck that you came in the moment you did cause had you not I’da been stuck in that same situation I was in last year & it wasn’t very pretty.

I love that you’re a casanova. Just saying things to me that guys would say to they girls, and although half the time I don’t buy it, I appreciate it anyway cause that’s what a man’s supposed to do to a woman; make her feel beautiful everyday. I like that you know what to say and when to say it. You may not be there all the time but you stay relavent enough to keep me around and interested.

I’m in place right now where I’m making a lot of big and important decisions in my life. Some things I can never take back and some things that will stay permanent. You should already know at this time that I’m a very simple girl with somewhat complex needs. I’m black and white, call shit the way I see it type and it can either go right or left. Simple.

At this time Yes, I am thinking about you and me and what can possibly come out of this dance between us. Forgive me but allow me at the same time to express what I feel. & At this point I feel I’ve given you the idea and thought of how I want things to be between us. I’ve addressed you before on this topic so it shouldn’t be a shocker by now for you to understand what I want and what I mean by all this.

I feel that part of the problem is how I’ve been allowing you to conduct yourself. Time is very important to me and I try & make the best out of it when given the chance even when it’s short. Not a lot of things impress me. I’ve seen it all & I been down that road. I’m getting older and finally realizing what I really want in a relationship. I just want someone who’s respectful, loyal and responsible and I feel you could be that.

The issue I’m having is the time and in reality is all I really want from you. But somehow that’s probably the last thing you can afford right now. I’d like a resolution to all this of course because I’ve grown to care about you and appreciate the time you do take to spend with me. I feel like the only way I’ll get what I want in return is if I respect myself. Respect myself by conducting in a way where in the end I can’t get mad at you for the way you react. Truth always comes out even with feelings.

Don’t get me wrong I love spending time with you, but this place we’re at right now. I feel like if we keep going down this road, there won’t be any room or no option to grow and that’s the last thing I want or want to feel. Of course I want a happy relationship. Who wouldn’t want that. But am I happy? not completely. We get by and I know you’re not satisfied either so… where do we go from here?

When you’re ready to try let me know. When you’re ready to be in a real relationship, let me know. When you’re ready to fall in love, let me know. When you’re ready to prioritize and sacrifice certain things like time, let me know. When you ready and want LOVE, let me know. Because that’s the only way I know how to be in a relationship and that’s all I want.

…going down this road and this path we’re on will just lead to mixed emotions, arguments and infidelity and we wouldn’t want that. I know I don’t.

Lastly, I wanna say all great things take time, patience and investment & if I haven’t told you yet. I do love talking to you, just talking….. I have a lot of respect for you. I hope you read this and are clear with my message and I hope you get clearance yourself. Getting what you want starts by knowing the things you don’t want and this is it for me. In the end I want you.